“Giving Up” Monologue

So this is it…this is my life. Every day the same old thing. Get the kids off to school, drop my girl off at work, bullshit around until 2, pick the kids up, pick my girl up. Great life huh? That’s the life of an unemployed man. Now, I’m sure you’re saying, “You complaining about being unemployed but what are you doing about it?” When I say bullshit around until I pick up the kids, I don’t mean actual bullshit. This is time I take looking for work. In and out of stores, restaurants, hell I even stand outside of Home Depot looking for something. Everyday its the same thing. “No. We aren’t hiring.” Or “Try back in another week.” I’m 30 fucking years old and I can’t even get a job at McDonalds! What kind of mess is that? My girl is always complaining, “When you gon’ get a job? I’m sick of doing this on my own.” *sighs* I know she’s tired but doesn’t she see how hard I’m trying? Guess that’s not enough, huh? The fact that I go out everyday trying to find work, the fact that I take care of our kids, that means nothing, right?

Guess I should be like the rest of these fools and start trapping. No one else wants to give me a chance, so I might as well make my own way. *pauses* Naw, I can’t do that. I got two boys. I can’t let them see me out on the corner slinging dope. My pops did that and that didn’t end well. He was shot a block away from the house. Naw, I want my boys to get out of the hood. Be better than me. *chuckles* Better than me? Hell, that’s anybody at this point. My life ain’t shit. Day in and day out. Can’t do what I need to do for my family. I can’t even take my girl out to eat. And clothes..man I’ve been rocking the same crap for years. You know what I should do? I should just end it all. I ain’t doing nothing but holding my family back. They deserve better than this. My boys deserve better than this. They deserve a real man to look up to. Not me. My girl deserves a real man who can take her out and show her the world. Not me. Yeah. I know what I to do. *lights dim, seconds later a gunshot is heard*

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